It’s hard to believe but, it is true! This month is the start of many a new leaf turning over with great hopes and anticipation for a better year than last or one that will continue to grow rewarding your every effort.
I started the year with a quiet moment of family time in Queensland. I don't set any real traditions EXCEPT the countdown to the new year! As this is my own faith in whatever you are doing, what you feel or how you project your energy at that strike of 12 influences your year ahead.
The last year 2018 leading into 2019 I was in Wagga Wagga NSW celebrating with sons and daughter. Listening to music we flip on the channel and realise we still have a good 5 minutes or so to go. Carried away with our renditions of favourite songs we all realise we missed the countdown. 2019 for me felt like it was all over the place, no real direction but more a time of here one minute and there the next.
So I was determined THIS year to count the year in. Armed with poppers and drink we all stood around after a long day half-asleep to send in the new year. After all, we spent a beautiful day at Mooloolaba beach and of course, all that excitement was catching up.
But, its tradition to count in the new year so no piking out and heading to bed is the motto. Well as we ready my daughter flicks her phone on and we look at the clock it's still 30 seconds to go. Then all of a sudden I hear Happy NEW year!!!!!. "What happened to the count down? " I asked. My daughter replied - ïts already the new year mum.
Another year missing the countdown was all I was thinking. I won't feel like I am prepared for the 2020 year. I wished to count it in as if I felt somewhere in my thoughts I was in some control over how I felt my new year should start.
I was stuck on the whole 10, 9, 8, 7, 6 ....... to mark my very existence of stepping into the new year. The whole purpose of staying awake and not sleeping through my new year. I mean deep down I know we make the year we want to experience happen. But, none the less I was robbed seriously of 10 whole SECONDS!!! of counting in my new year.
As every year within moments of the cheer and poppers making a mess, the hugs and well wishes we often head to bed or home. I had to let go of the very thought those 10 seconds had passed and I now was smack bang into the first 5 minutes of 2020.
I had to understand that what may mean something to me as my point of recognising what I believe to be my walking into a new year is sometimes completely different from how others may envision their perception of the moment.
After retiring to bed I laid for a long time reflecting on my year ahead. My choices, the challenges and the acceptance of the change that comes with life moving ahead. I know deep down I am happy and fulfilled, however, the conversation with myself was more on accepting how I might feel situations should be. That my traditions are mine and what I most likely instilled in myself does not mean those same traditions need to be exact to be enjoyed the same way. Well, it sounds good in my thoughts at the time - right.
I don't make new years resolutions as I just don't see a point as I tend to change depending on my mood or ambition at any moment. Yes, I know many others do and some accomplish these with great success and effort. I always considered what I feel at that time is different from how I might feel 3 months into the year.
But, I do have this crazy tradition about that last 10 seconds before the clock turns 12 and bam happy new year! I know I am finding it hard to shake the one promise I made to myself in 2019 was to count in 2020. I seriously will be reconsidering that promise strongly at the end of 2020 and trying my best to relinquish control! Yes, Carolyn! let it go it's a mere 10 seconds - you have so many more seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years ahead of you why hang onto those mere 10 seconds.
Those 10 seconds define my readiness, my preparation, clear my energy. Those 10 seconds give way to let the past year and its journey come to rest. I focus on those very 10 seconds as the rebirth of now a new time, a time to flourish, walk forward and grow with new anticipation.
So, amidst the counting down I symbolic release the old, the popping of the poppers and streamers symbolise the celebration and cheers and hugs resemble the joy and connection of those who will share this new transition. Now I feel half-cocked and ill-prepared likened a rushed delivery.
Ironically, just as the year came in, my year has been influenced thus far with the same temperament. Not enough time to get everything into balance. I know deep down those 10 seconds would not have made a great deal of anything to what 2020 will reveal - however in my head every time I am pushed from one project to another, one obligation to another or one situation into another. My little thought voice pops up and says - "see you missed that 10 seconds of counting yourself in and being prepared now look at you running around trying to find some extra time to get everything completed."
Even this post is late! not by 10 seconds but 10 days. In Tarot, the Wheel of Fortune is represented by the number 10 often the timing of opportunities, gaining attention to a beginning a new cycle. The Wheel of Fortune can be the bearer of an unexpected inheritance, changes of fortunate events and reversed often denotes ill timing, problematic delays or unexpected setback.
The 0 (zero) is represented by the Fool in Tarot, stepping into the unknown with blind faith. Embarking on that leap of faith towards what will be will be. In reverse it's all about cautious - be careful, don't be overzealous. In numerology, the number 10 represents an understanding of unity and the need for independence. The 1 generally a strong formidable presence pioneering for individuality and leadership is subdued by 0 (zero) the number of infinity.
Angel number 10 implies " to stay positive and to trust in the power of your divine guides". So, those 10 seconds could have various meanings and lessons of understanding in which I am to embrace throughout 2020.
I guess as the year progresses I will see the relevance of all that will be revealed.